Bully Bully

Bullying is something that has gotten a lot of attention lately. I understand that with the expansion of social media so also continues the expansion of aggression.  In this case, bullying.  I don't know how much bullying in school has changed but I have been led to believe the majority of the bullying that is getting attention these days in cyber.  I spoke with a high school teacher who once told me how most of the attacks she sees' come through places like Facebook, Twitter, etc... and a majority of bullies are girls harassing other girls.  Now frankly, I'm too far detached to understand what it's like to be in high school anymore.  I remember when I was in high school and the angst and never-ending awkwardness I felt, but I didn't even have a home computer, let alone Internet, and Facebook hadn't even been invented yet.  So to say I understand today's victims or even bullies would be false.  I also knew, even then, high school was bullshit.  People were stupid, and most of the drama didn't matter.  I had outgrown high school before I even got there, so again, I can't really relate to what today's kids are going through.  I do know maliciousness, in any form, is awful, hurtful and scarring, but I don't understand why so many victims of bullying are turning their anger inward and hurting themselves more with drugs, cutting or suicide.  It sounds harsh, but to the victims I want to say, "Stop making yourself a victim!" 'Block,' or 'de-friend' those who hurt you, stand up to the ones who offend you, fight for yourself, respect yourself enough to not need validation through the opinion of someone else. If someone has a problem with you, fuck 'em!

I am generally a peaceful person, however in this case I feel like society is coddling not strengthening kids.  We are teaching kids to endure, but not change.  Sweet little commercials with celebrities tenderly saying 'bullying is wrong' will not change a bully.  I think first we should be teaching community again, we are so selfish and divided these days, there is nothing to bring kids together.  Secondly I think we've lost a bit of old fashioned values.  Kids just don't respect anyone anymore. ( Just typing that makes me feel old). 13 year old girls use names like 'bitch,' 'whore' and 'slut' as terms of endearment for their closest friends; they don't even know what it means to respect themselves enough to see the flaws in that! If this is how they not only expect to treat those they care about (and expect to be treated in return) then God knows what they're capable of saying or doing when they actually want to hurt someone.  If you even want to win a war, send in teenage girls.

As I said, generally I am a peaceful person. There is something to say for teaching kids to be passive and let go of those who speak against them, there is strength in this, Martin Luther King Jr. was notorious for this.  People your whole life will hate you and speak ill towards you, cut these people out of your life as much as possible and otherwise let it go, find your validation in those who love you, not those who despise you.  And if you are confronted in a way in which you cannot back down, for God's sake stand up for yourself!
Again, I know bullying has escalated to a new and terrifying level, and I don't fully understand it.  I just believe you will remain oppressed and a victim as long as you allow yourself to be.  It's cliche but 'no one can offend you without your consent.'